Gemzar, I Don't Know

My mind is not here or there. I am in true "chemo brain" mode. I have too many things to do right now with not the right mind and no energy. Can only write in short sentences.

Today, I go in for another Gemzar treatment. Please pray that my white blood cell levels will be high enough for me to receive treatment. My husband had the flu last week, and A3 had some weird, I-don't-know-illness on Saturday. I have been dodging coughs, colds, and flus for the past few months.

Yesterday, someone said, "I heard that you weren't feeling well on Saturday." How do you explain that that is how it always is? That that is my normal. I just have to push through to get things done as a wife, mother, teacher, and pastor's wife.

by Denise Calazans Kobayashi