Absentee

Last week, I was absent. I hope that you noticed. I had planned on prewriting posts and scheduling them during my time away. But, it didn't happen.

Anyways, we were on vacation last week! Whoohoo! My sister's family, brother's family, my parents, and our family, all met in South Carolina. All seventeen of us had a wonderful time eatin', swimmin', and talkin'. I was so excited to be with my family, near the ocean, and near the ocean. Did I tell you that I love the ocean? Oh yeah, and my family too!

We even had papparazzi taking pictures of everything we did: my brother and brother-in-law. They took out their professional cameras and took so many pictures that I really didn't have to take out my camera. Didn't want them to see the pictures I took because the pictures they took were so professional-looking. Really.

We were also able to fulfill my parents' dream of taking an all-family photo. There was a controversy of whether we should wear khakis and white shirts or jeans and white shirts. The controversy was settled in South Carolina, and we ended up using both types of clothing. I am very thankful to say that all Christmas pictures are set: for our family, my sister's family, my brother's family, and my parents. Expect, white shirts, khakis or jeans, and smiles.

A song that kept going through my mind throughout my time there was "O Love That Wilt Not Let Me Go." Specifically, the first verse:

O Love that wilt not let me go

I rest my weary soul in Thee

I give Thee back the life I owe

That in Thine ocean depths its flow

May richer, fuller be

I secretly sang this song when I was alone or when the wind made it impossible for others to hear me sing. I think I wrote about singing and me...

He kept reminding me that He doesn't want to let me go. To be honest, I would let go of me. I can be pretty unbearable at times. I'll be the first to admit that I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, still do. But, the fact still remains: He still loves me. Pretty incredible God!

by ajfakes

I Choose You

On Monday, A2, A3, and I went to a nearby shopping mall. I had to return some swim suits that my sister had bought for me, and I needed to get a new battery for my watch (that I have had since high school). No, it wasn't a Swatch (which first came out when I was in high school). Although, I did pass a Swatch store at the mall...

About the swim suits. My sister had called me a few months back telling me that she wanted to buy me a swim suit. I told her that I didn't need one because I had one that I had only worn a few times. She insisted that she wanted to get one for me, and I told her that I would get back to her after I tried on the one I had.

Well, I did and it was a rude awakening. My body has changed a lot since my mastectomy. Hello, Moni!? Isn't that obvious??? Well, I didn't realize how much until this situation arose. I can't wear the same styles that I did in the past. Now I know why my plastic surgeon wanted to remove fat from my belly and inject it into other area to even out the symmetry of my body. This whole bathing suit situation made me realize how much was cut from my body. I apologize if I am being too crude. 

Thus, my search for a mastectomy friendly bathing suit began. I was lead to Land's End, which has mastectomy bathing suits. My sister ordered some for me and sent some more styles that she had found at a local store that carries the same brand. Another rude awakening: most did not fit or cover the way they needed to. I had to reorder other styles in different sizes, and I finally found one that fits. My mom does have to adjust the straps a bit, but it does offer the coverage that I now need.

I never knew that it could be this difficult to get a bathing suit - post mastectomy. Really. I did see some speciality stores that did sell mastectomy swimsuits (online), but they were either too expensive or not nice looking.

About the watch battery. I dropped off the watch to get the battery changed. The woman told me that it would take 15 minutes, so we waited outside the store. The store was located on the second floor of the mall. A2, A3, and I were looking over the railing watching the people below. The railing was made of metal on top and clear plastic/glass below. Quite honestly, I didn't want to lean fully into it because it felt like I would fall over. Don't like looking over edges.

Just as I was thinking that, A3 said, "I'm afraid that this railing is going to fall over. Mom, what if this railing falls over?"

Me: "You will all be very rich."

A3: "Why?"

Me: "Because if I fall over and die, this shopping mall will have to pay you a lot of money because they didn't make the railings safe."

A3: (Quickly comes to me and hugs me tightly) "Mom, I don't want money, I WANT YOU."

Love Song For a Savior

I was first introduced to this song when I was in Korea. That was a very long time ago. I used to listen to it on my portable disc player if that gives you a hint. Some of you might not even know what a portable disc player is??? Look it up. It was historic.

During that time, I used to exercise and jog a lot. I would put in a disc and go running. It helped me to physically feel better, and it helped me to vent my stress. I remember listening to this song as I jogged in the huge, soccer field that was next to the dorms at the Korean seminary that I attended for a year. I can still picture the clear, night sky that was filled with twinkling stars. I ran and I ran, asking God to speak to my heart.

I still listen to this song... thanks to iTunes. Now, I listen to it with my children. Sometimes, I can hear them sing-a-long... and my constant prayer is that they, too, will fall in love with Jesus.

by GreatChristianLyrics