What Do You Do With Broken Dreams? Part I
Knowing what I knew about my mom left a deep impression on my heart. I could not even begin to imagine a life lived without a mother or father. How did orphans live? I found my heart being pulled in a direction that I could not stop. Who would take care of them?
When I was in high school, I remember watching an episode on 20/20 about orphans in Romania. I was sitting in the basement watching the program by myself. As I saw the rows and rows of cribs... as I saw the children inside those cribs rocking themselves back and forth... as I saw the faces devoid of emotion and hopelessness... who could not have their heart broken? Tears poured.
Taking to heart World Vision's founder's life theme: "Let my heart be broken by the things that break the heart of God."
When I went to Korea for what I thought would be one year, I went with some other English teachers to an orphanage for younger children. We helped a grandmother who took care of 6+ children in one room. All of those children had special needs. I would cradle and hold this little girl who could not see, talk, or walk. One day, I heard the gentle voice of the Holy Spirit speaking into my heart. Whatever you do for one of the least of these, you are doing unto me. That thought was overwhelming. I tried to hold her closer and closer. I wanted to hold Jesus.
Looking at pictures of starving North Korean orphans...
My last year in Korea, I was at a Korean seminary. There was a group of students who would go to a nearby orphanage and tutor the children. This orphanage had children from 1st/2nd grade until high school. There was some supervision but not a mother's individual care. Children were hardened to newcomers. It took a lot of time, patience, and love to break through. The girl I was tutoring had been abandoned by her mother. She still remembered being left at an outdoor food stand. Her mother promising to return, but never to be seen again.
Amy Carmichael's ministry in India...
And who could ignore God's constant reminder in His Word to care for orphans?